Ugly kid
A lady gets on a train with her baby. A guy sitting across from her
looks at the baby and starts laughing hysterically.
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The stranger
A guy runs out of a Las Vegas hotel and says to a stranger, "Can you loan me two hundred bucks? My wife had a terrible accident."
The stranger says, "If you need two hundred dollars, what are you
using to gamble with?"
The guy replies, "Oh, I've got gambling money." (Read more...)
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The Definition of Intelligence
Two men were digging a ditch on a very hot day. One said to the other, "Why are we down in this hole digging a ditch when our boss is standing up there in the shade of a tree?"
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The Texas Salesman
A keen Texas lad applied for a salesman's job at a city department store. The store was the biggest in the world and sold everything under the sun.
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The Engineer and the Frog
An engineer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess."
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Bear in a Bar in Billings, Montana
A bear walked into a bar and sat down. He banged on the bar with his paw and demanded a beer.
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George W Bush and Condolisa Rice
George W Bush and Condolisa Rice are having a meeting... read on.
George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening?
Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.
George: Great. Tell me all about it.
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John Paul II in an interview
John Paul II in an interview:
"I went to America. They asked me: Why do You come to America?
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THE DRUG BUST
The phone rings at Federal Drug Enforcement Agency headquarters.
"Hello?"
"Hello, is this the Federal Drug Enforcement Agency?"
"Yes. What can we do for you?"
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Brain transplant
The patient's family gathered to hear what the specialists had to say. "Things don't look good. The only chance is a brain transplant. This is an experimental procedure. It might work, but the bad news is that brains are very expensive, and you will have to pay the costs yourselves."
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